I am consumed by emptiness and darkness and I fear that it is getting worse by the day. That doesn’t give me an excuse from ripping off Manic Street Preachers but no words can quite succinctly explain what I want to say/write as of the moment.
Each day and night is filled with dread and I take each day with trepidation. Each second fills me with panic, desperately trying to find a way out of my head. I can’t make them stop.
Have you ever felt so bad? Ever felt such immense pain that you cannot cry? I’ve been self-harming just so I could feel calm and feel relief.
I don’t know how long will this go on and if I could ever win this round.
I am defeated.